old and confused

i'm feeling old.
i have high blood pressure now
and arthritis in my neck
and i got dizzy during my personal trainer
and i have high glucose
and low potassium
and the chiropractor wants to see my 3x week
ADD, too!

a cop stopped me for driving without my lights (oi vey)
and a woman honked at my after i moved into
her lane (suv? old? bad neck? distraction?)
why keep track of these things?

but i'm fit
and lost 6 lbs and look pretty fucking
good for a guy of 59

my work is in total disarray
after the "meth high" if you will
of doing all those books
("wow!", "congratulations!")
what? i don't deserve that!
take that back!

i painted that big
"green arctic" piece then froze up
like it's "too good" to mess with
ha!

my faux wall street book
just seems like too fucking much work
and i want it to be GOOD

thank god i'm going to the prison today
and afterwards
i might feel grateful again!